5-4-Fri: Washington Post Hunt

Editor's note: The Washington Post "Hunt" is organized by Dave Barry (hilarious humorist), Tom Shroder (Post Managing Editor), and Gene Weingarten (dude who inexplicably hangs around with the other two guys). The Hunt is modeled on the wildly popular Miami Herald Hunt which has been run for more than two decades--also started by the trio. Contestants gather downtown and are posed 5 individual puzzles that take them from the main stage all across one of the city's neighborhoods; they then return to the main stage for a final challenge. All answers are in the form of numbers. Lunatic fringe smarties who answer all 6 quizzes correctly before anyone else win bragging rights and an annual prize. The 2009 running of the Post Hunt marked the second year of the event in DC.

DAVE: So, this year we decided to take our 19-year-old inner-city, clue-driven scavenger hunt and tailor it exclusively to frustrate iClipse.

TOM: Last year he was unaware of the inaugural version of the Washington Post Hunt in DC. This year he was invited to join a Hunt team by two friends -- primarily because Paula and Bella were both unavailable -- and became quite intrigued.

GENE: I am much funnier in person.

DAVE: We decided to play on his budding interest and excitement by humiliating and confusing him in public.

TOM: Seemed only fair.

GENE: Seriously, my columns don't show it, but I crack these guys up.

DAVE: We began by challenging iClipse and his teammates to the first of 5 puzzles and -- okay, this is really funny -- the trick was that the clue was unsolvable!

TOM: (Snort)

GENE: Hee hee.

DAVE: Okay, okay, heh-heh, okay, (TOM: Snort) stop it, stop it, haw, okay, it was actually unknowable, (GENE: heeheeheehee) and they totally failed to win as a result of, heh-heh, as a result of (TOM: Snort), because it, stop it, stop it, you're killing me, because, bwa ha ha ha ha ha!!!

TOM: Nonono, stop it, ha-ha, ha, hahahahahahaha...

Editor's note: Although the "Statues" puzzle was an insane and unfair challenge, replete with a classic spirit-of-the-game no-no (a wrong answer clearly appeared to be plausibly correct), the rest of the Hunt was a brain-tingling experience in awesomeness and is the topic of this Friday's list:

1. The Crowds. Some 10,000 (ish) folks turned up to play the Hunt. It is great to see so many people all tearing around their city having fun, fun, fun. The friendly competition atmosphere featured out-of-towners (some from Miami itself); family teams; humongous, obviously semi-pro teams with matching tee shirts; and dogs (small, emergency back-up dogs, even).

2. The Clock Puzzle. Okay, I bust Gene's chops for his woeful "humor" columns, but he does some smart reportage for the Post and he ghost wrote a 300 word "First Person Singular" column for the Post Magazine section that made absolutely no use of the letters "s," "i," or "x" -- you gotsa respect that! I was somewhat scared that Gene and I think alike because I was instantaneously struck by what the answer had to be.

3. Dave Barry Played Guitar. It wasn't a Rock Bottom Remainders concert, but I'd pay money to see Dave play the guitar. Heck, I went mostly to see Dave, period. He led the crowd in a power ballad version of "Old MacDonald." Good times.

4. The Company. I have no illusions about WHY I was chosen to participate in the 2009 Post Hunt. Had better, smarter, more reliable, girlier humans been available, I would have been left home asleep and clueless. But, I am a humble, humble monkey and grateful for the chance to enjoy the day with good friends pursuing the sublimely ridiculous. This is a reminder to get your friends together and have fun as often as possible. Good for the soul.

5. The Brain Hurtage. Not that "Angels & Demons" didn't get all up in the face of my grey matter; not that I don't enjoy trying to figure out why Dick Cheney is so intent on proving that Nancy Pelosi KNEW that his Administration was breaking the law and misleading the public; but it is refreshing to have your intellectual and creative butt kicked by three deviously evil geniuses. My brain hurt for 2 days. Kudos.

PS - During the online "Aftermath" chat, iClipse's close, personal friend Shannon asked a question, cleverly disguising herself as "Arlington, VA". Now she's all famous. Shannon: "We are considering the best type of teammate for 2010. We added a poetry-knowing, geography-knowing, jogger with a hollow leg. Good add. We had to balance him out with female-drive attention to detail and multi-tasking. We avoided too many alpha-dogs. We did not win...Any suggestions for building a team next year? Are shirts a factor? Follow up: Best place to drown sorrows/punish weak brain cells afterwards?" Hunt co-creator Gene Weingarten made up for a lot by responding: "It would help if Dave, Tom or I were on your team." Oh, and in addition to playing their lead guitarist's axe, I wonder if Dave knows "Take a Chance on Me" by ABBA?; now playing on iTunes.